Friday, February 19, 2010

Life...

2010 is in full swing and I can hardly believe that it is already mid-February. This year has already been quite full of celebration, struggle, busyness, joy, encouragement, peace, and challenge. I have learned SO much!

Spiritually, I feel like i am learning what it means to love others more than myself. Recently, I have been constantly aware of places that I demand my own way while at the same time, I pray, "Lord, not my will but your's." The other day, I got upset at Justin because he wouldn't stop a get me a diet coke during happy hour at Sonic before church (we were late and he leads worship). I pitched a "23 year old fit" really meaning I gave him the silent treatment and when I broke it began to vent frustration on other areas of life completely unrelated to me wanting a diet coke. Long story short, I demanded my own way and broke down when I did not get it. Fortunately, I serve a forgiving God who softened my heart and gave me the grace to apologize and seek reconciliation. All this over a diet coke... DIet cokes have become a bit of an ebenezer in my life. I have recently sought to give up cokes and every time that I really want one (which is more often than I would like to admit), I remember how it is not my will that matters but the Lord's... and He is the best of planners! So... I know this all really centered around diet coke... but that proves that God can use anything in life to change a heart... and that has really been driving what I am learning recently. I have an interview at Houston Christian High School for a position that I would really love! I want this job... it seems to be such a perfect fit and the way I found out about this job just seems like a God thing. I have to keep reminding myself that my worth, my happiness, my satisfaction in life is found in Christ. Not my will but His be done in my life. Whether or not I get this job, my desire is to love God and love his people. Not wanting to compartmentalize life anymore than I already try to... but God is doing work in another area of my life. I feel myself being able to joyfully submit... praise the Lord! For the past month or so, I have realized what a master TV is in my life. It was such a huge part of my life... I wasted so much time... I was consumed. I have realized this and have tried desperately to quit. This week, I have implemented a fast from my TV viewing. I more or less covenanted with the Lord that I wanted to uproot this idol in my life and replace it with His Spirit and I could only do it by his power. I have been super encouraged my Psalm 40. Psalm 40:17 says, "As for me, I am poor and needy, but the Lord takes thought of me." Wow! The Lord takes thought of me in my poor, weak, completely helpless spot. Praise Him! Needless to say, I learning...

Academically, I have been reading a book called Teaching with the Brain in Mind... it has changed how I think about teaching. It has made me think so much about raising children at home and at school... taking in account what is happening in their brain and how we can use what we know about their brain to most effectively teach them. I would highly recommend it!

Parenting-wise... I have thought so much about how I want to raise children one day... and no, there are no children on the way! But I do think about my future children (Lord willing) often and every time, I pray that the Lord would captivate their heart. Tonight, I listened to a podcast by Ted Tripp on parenting that I would recommend to any parent. I want to be a gracious parent. I think one of the greatest things I heard tonight is to covenant to God, your spouse, yourself, and your children never to discipline when your heart and spirit are not in check. YOU CANNOT RELY ON YOURSELF (for we too are depraved people)... I pray that I would be a prayerful wife and mother who first goes and prays and check myself... and then disciplines out of love... I want my children to honor their father and mother, as the Lord commands, that their days my be long, and that it may go well with them (Deuteronomy 5:16). Other ideas I have had about parenting, I want to take my children to the store periodically and let them pick any fruit or vegetable that we cannot identify. Together, I want us to find a recipe and makes something that uses that item... then, I want us to all try it. I think it could be fun and it is such a teachable moment in some many ways! 1. Children are learning basics on cooking, 2. they are learning how to cook healthy things (like veggies), 3. they are learning to identify fruits and veggies (sometimes I forget that this is not genetic but learned), 4. it would be a fun bonding activity, 5. why not?!?!

Well, this does not even come close to summarizing where I am at in life but it's a start... Peace along the way...